4-21-17 Insight Post

I’m going to be incredibly honest here today. I fear judgement, but I’m diving in anyway. I am so far behind in our Bible reading plan. I just finished James. This feels terrible. I feel shameful and inadequate. I am on church staff. I lead our family ministry and I can’t keep up with one chapter a day? It’s really kind of pitiful. When life gets busy, why do I put my relationship with God on a back burner? It’s so bad for me. It makes me weak, judgmental, and selfish.

There are many disciplines or chores that are beneficial when trying to lead a healthy successful life. The most important one is spending time with God every day. When my life gets busy and chaotic, I place Him lower on my priority list. When He is what helps me the most, why do I so easily push Him to the side when my day gets rough? In James 3:16 it says, “For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition you will find disorder and evil of every kind.” This verse helps me realize that I do it because of my own pride and selfishness. I think I can do it better on my own. I don’t need to spend time with God. I know what the Bible says. I’ve read it. I can say a quick prayer and be covered for the day and then go about doing things my own way. This never really works out the way I think it will. It never saves me time. It never gives me clarity. It never gives me extra rest. When I don’t spend time with God every day, I become cranky and selfish. I begin to compare myself to others and I start to judge others unfairly. I think handling it on my own will be easier, faster, or better, but that is wrong thinking. It’s my own pride telling me I can do it better without God. When I keep Him number one, EVERYTHING is better. He provides supernatural strength when I am tired and weak. He gives me wisdom when I am unclear. He gives me patience and compassion when I am empty. And, most importantly He gives me forgiveness and grace when I mess up.

Today I am going to start again. Today I’m going to read Matthew chapter 12. I’m going to spend time thinking about what God wants me to learn from it, and I’m going to have a conversation with God through prayer. If you are in the same place as me, I encourage you to start fresh, today.

-- Steph Schleyer Family Life Director New Hope Church 703.971.4673 #262

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